Reading Wrestlings

“They told me she needs to repeat Kindergarten next year. She isn’t reading yet.” 

I tried to present a calm, encouraging response to my friend as I fought back panic in my heart. Glancing across the 4-5 year old Sunday school room, I observed little Declan, blond hair and mischievous grin, tossing LEGOS from under the table at his buddy, Gregory. An expert at play, reading was not yet in my young student’s list of abilities either.

Monday morning, after a 15 minute reading wrestling match, I sent Declan away to play with his two year old brother, Kellen. He hated those phonetic word lists I was force feeding him. Anxiously, I remembered my friend and wondered if I was failing my son. How could I, a credentialed teacher, fail to teach my own child how to read?

Of all the tasks assigned to the homeschool mama, teaching reading may be the most challenging. Declan’s older brother read without much help at all. At the age of three, Liam raced through Bob books and deciphering street signs with surprising ease. Comparing my son to his brother? Bad idea. Lining him up with current school district standards? This was a recipe for angst in my heart. Somehow, I needed to learn how to teach my third son to read.

Lunchtime ended. Little brother, Kellen, was ready for nap time. Declan wanted to stay awake. 

“I’ll give you a choice. Go take a nap with Kellen, or snuggle and read with me for a few minutes.” He took the bait. I sat on the couch, waiting to see what book Declan would choose.

Declan plopped Dick and Jane and Friends onto my lap. How did that even get on our shelf? Back in my teacher training days, I learned that those “outdated,” repetitive stories were poor choices for teaching reading. No one told Declan!

“Look, look. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, look.” read my son. For him, sight words just made sense. I gladly sacrificed our peaceful nap time for a willing and ready student. Within a few weeks, Declan progressed through Dick and Jane, recognizing those sight words in other places as well. I set aside the highly recommended phonics based parent guide and instead, allowed my son to guide his own next steps in reading.

Truth be told, Declan didn’t immediately become a “reader,” but as I persevered and studied my student, he grew stronger week by week. Over time, he was happily checking out Geronimo Stilton books from the library and getting so lost in them that I had to work to call him away from those humorous tales.

Today, my son is studying English and Philosophy at UWF, planning to become an English professor. He eagerly shares stories and ideas with me. I think about how I worried in his kindergarten days! Time is a great perspective shifter.

“Sow your seed in the morning, and at evening let not your hands be idle, for you do not know which will succeed, whether this or that, or whether both will do equally well.” Ecclesiastes 11:6

Homeschool mama, if your young student is not reading yet, don’t panic like I did! I wish I had been quicker to pray and slower to assume failure in those early reading days. I wasted the opportunity to enjoy my energetic son because I was putting him on someone else’s timetable. 

Since those kindergarten days, I have supported many families of young readers. Some kids come to reading from part to whole thinking. Phonics  are a perfect tool for them. Others see their worlds from whole to part. For them, sight words really get the ball rolling. There is plenty of time to learn  decoding along the way. 

Homeschooling our kids takes wisdom and patience. Thankfully, God provides both if we remember to ask. Providing a word rich learning environment doesn’t need to be stressful. It can be meaningful and fun to help our young learners dive into the world of letters, words and stories. 

If you want to learn more about literacy and homeschooling, I am offering a free Zoom call on Tuesday, June 11th, from 2-3pm. Message your email to me and I will send the link. I will be laying out strategies and taking questions to help you plan for the upcoming school year.

Remember, 

He who began a good work in your family will be faithful to complete it (Philippians 1:6), you are not in this alone.